Monday, June 18, 2007

Britain's got Problems


A couple of posts back, I laid into TV3 for showing a Variety show called 'Britain's got talent'. I didn't go into it then, but my reasons were many. One of them was because I honestly believe TV3 to be the media wing of the Devil. Another, and the main reason in my eyes, was the fact that this show, a celebration of British talent, was being broadcast on a Irish television station. Now, some of you will point out that TV3 get nothing from the government and they can show what they like, and isn't Mark Cagney a great inspiration to us all etc etc.. But I take massive offence to this. RTE are losing valuable advertising revenue to these losers and because of this, home grown programming is suffering on the national carrier. TV3's 'local' output stretches to a breakfast show hosted by a bunch of gormless dickheads that looks like it's broadcast from Dundrum Mental Hospital, an 'entertainment' magazine that would turn your stomach and a News show that is so cheap and tacky you can pick it up in Hector Greys for €2.


And then there was Keith Duffy's box.

Here's the thing though.

I watched Britain's got talent.

One of the most disturbing things about this (other than the parade of bed-sit murderers that appeared on it) was the fact the 'the Irish' could vote. Why on Gods earth would anyone in this country want to vote in this? Where was the benefit for us? Oh, yeah.. 10c from every call went towards the Royal Variety Fund. Bless

The other disturbing thing about this horrible experience was the performers. They ranged from a singing Bookie to a toothless 6 years old, and a couple of idiotic barmen to a guy piggybacking his brothers death.

So, a weird looking guy won after tugging at 'the nations' heartstrings by singing Nessum Dorma. People cried and wailed. Now, If Ian Huntley sang this to me while he pinned both my cats to the wall, I'd probably cry too. It's that kind of song. But the Brits didn't care. It captured the mood of a country still trying to get over "7/7". Anyway, he won out by beating a bunch of losers that were so offensive my TV kept switching itself off. There was a guy who used every opportunity a mike was waved in front of his face to tell 'us' that his Brother was dead and he was left to care for his two children (These children were paraded about regularly too). He would then break into 'tears in heaven'..


Give. me. a. break.


One of the other acts was a 6 years old girl who should be at home playing with her Sindy doll or whatever but instead was attempted to sing like an adult. The 20 hours a day practice really showed and she's a credit to her parents. There were other acts too. All of them uniformly shit and the sort off people you would leave your kids with, if you despised your kids and wanted to see the back of them that is.

And, let us not forget that the show was presented by Ant and Dec.

Come back Keith Duffy, all is forgiven.